PJam let me put it to you this way. I'm just going to use this as an example and analogy.
If you were my personal friend and business partner, and I lured you into doing business with me as a partner in the beginning for the first 10 years, and we signed a contract, but also had a verbal commitment to one another on a friendly handshake, a good word and faith, that we would continue to do business well into the future for decades. We had trust in one another. We had a lot of good times, a lot of company parties, good clientele, and made a lot of money for everyone. We were happy with the way we conduct ourselves and enjoyed the fruits of our labor. We were friends and business partners.
Then one day one of us discovered that the other partner became an alcoholic and drug addict. They were caught skimming off the profits for themselves, and they were slowly but surely stealing clientele away, and forming their own alternate business for themselves. Furthermore the other partner was using the company resources available to them to purchase whatever they wanted. Eat whatever they wanted, room-and-board wherever they wanted. Fine hotels expensive dinners, etc. But because one party couldn't prove all this in a court of law and terminate the other partner, because the other partner broke their commitments and trust, but they were still legally forced to do business together because of contract.
Do you really think one person is going to be calling the other out to a dinner party anytime soon? Or have a lunch break and a beer or a round of hoops, or a game of racquetball or golf at the country club with them? I hope the answer would be an astounding no and contact would be as very limited and strictly business as possible.
A person walking away from a marriage is no different than the situation above.
You hold out on that person as much as possible doing with only absolutely necessary transactions and limited communication as possible under contract. You want to have nothing to do with them and you keep yourself focused on you, your business, and the people that support you, and help you grow it.
It is only when the person who has had all these flagrant violations, goes to AA meetings or 6 step program, admits they have a problem, completely breaks down in caves, restores All the Monies and clients that they embezzled, and comes to you with a contrite heart, with full humility and sincerity, and the willingness to attempt to be trusted again in time through their actions words and deeds on your terms, after they restore what's rightfully owed to you.
You hold out to the end if there ever is an end? But you keep growing your business moving in your direction no matter what you keep moving forward without them until they demonstrate full-hearted repentance and ask for forgiveness. No half-hearted attempts are allowed.
Now do you understand how to conduct yourself, and what these temp checks really are? And what cake eating really is? Let them go. If they broke their commitments, if their hearts are not in it? Then why should yours be? Your time is valuable, your money is valuable, your assets are valuable, and your integrity and reputation is valuable. Your high clientele is the social proof of that and of quality, because you know what you and your business are worth.
You acknowledging or going to an anniversary dinner with the WW is like the good business partner trying to have dinner with the other bad business partner who was stealing from them, and wants to embezzle, and wants everything to themselves, their way, all the time. And you are the one that is initiating contact to make amends, and saying please forgive me when you have done nothing wrong. You dig?
