Lurch, I am seeing a lot of red flags here. It seems you were ready to D, then found out that it was going to cost you $800/month, and then you were willing to try to R.
Then you met someone new and then flip-flopped back to wanting to D, but are trying to do it in a way you can get out of support. Look, the system is rigged against men. Always has been, likely always will be. You can agreed to 50/50 custody, view the $800/month as a "stupid" tax for marrying poorly, and moving on.
Look D is always a choice for the LBS. No one would blame you when a WAS is unfaithful especially, to just say forget it, I don't want to be married to a cheater. But understand that even that choice has consequences. The break up of a marriage is NEVER EVER pain free.
So this is why I asked if you were impatient, or impulsive. As someone that has gone on to R with his W, I can tell you that it isn't easy. It is hard work. We all know how devastating D can be on both spouses, on finances, and most of all on the kids. So no matter what you do it will be difficult and painful, and take years to heal from it.
Anyway, these are my observations.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
