You are still putting your happiness and well being on your W being in your life. ....What you truly want is the pain to go away. Trust me, your W coming back won't stop the pain.
When you have grace and joy, no person can steal that from you. Find peace, I know it's hard. Also, most of us on here had to fake it to get to a place of acceptance.
Take it from me, even if your W comes around, it won't change to fact you need to heal. I'm working with these issues now, insecurities, comparisons, hyper worrying. They are going away the more I learn to love myself. It's nothing my wife can do to help me process or make those things better. Having confidence in myself and knowing that I cant control another person does. No matter what the outcome of my M, I will be fine. I now know that. Will there be pain, yes. But I will make it thru whatever obstacles are in my way.
Just because you have a good day, don't erase the pains of the past. Being Consistent and time does. She must see, those type of days and a confident Wolf.
I had a preacher tell me that my W had a rollerdex of pictures of me in her mind, and they were all bad, my job now is to overwrite all those old pictures/slash memories with better pictures. That way when she thinks of me, if there enough good photos/memories the old ones won't come up first. Getting all those old memories overwritten takes time.
Takes yesterday as a good memory stored and old bad memory overwritten. One day at a time.
Onward and forward
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
