You're right. And I think I have a tendency to search for the cloud in every silver lining. All the time. I need to watch for that because it [censored] the joy out of things for me and it also really drags down other people. So. The kids had a nice time, the in-laws were cordial with me and asked me how I was doing, I got some much needed time alone, and that's all that matters for the time being. I texted this morning and thanked them for their gifts for the children and said they'd had a lovely time, and they sent some nice photos back. Made no mention of H and I plan not to if the communication continues. I guess I am a bit sad about not being invited this year - but on the other hand, I did really need the time alone and I made the most of it.
I am really proud of myself for the stopping smoking. H never liked it and often complained, and I ignored him because his criticism made me feel controlled. But actually everything he said about my smoking was right, and I am feeling better in all kinds of ways for stopping. It's also helped me put on a bit of weight - which was badly needed. My vanity says - I am glad to see the in-laws looking sun-kissed and healthy rather than shadow-eyed and thin-as-a-wraith which I was earlier this year so at least there's that!
