Those sound like amazing holidays FS! I get you on the detachment versus coldness. Maybe as distancers both of us need to lean towards being warmer rather than colder? You sound detached in terms of not thinking that much about your H and I don’t think that being kind is something you should ever regret if it’s true kindness and not manipulation or done in expectation of something in return. Maybe thinking whether the behaviour is something you’d do for a good friend is a good benchmark for all of us in this?
