Attracting the WW back ?

[gzabetas]

I continue to read other peoples's posts, new and old as my own situation develops.

What is really sinking in with these WW, WAW, MLC, whatever you wish to call them is the audacity of their actions.

Most of us here had some negative traits, mostly neglecting the spouse, trapped in work, not displaying the love we truly carried for them inside etc.

But for crying out loud, what they are doing is extremely out of proportion.

I am still helping my wife drive in the final nail into me as a way to speed things up. Getting her new apartment, Utilities etc. She will be taking care of my son, and I need to make sure they will have electricity, an oven, a washer. I need to safe proof the balcony for the kid (add a fence).
And then, when I am gone, her affair person can walk in and do their sweet lovemaking I asssume. I still dont know who he is.

She reminds of Paulie from Goodfellas.

"You dont have money, FU pay me" (her alimony, while I am unemployed)

"You want to see your kid. FU I am taking full custody" (hurting both the kid and me)

"You are right in front of me, FU I am taking a call from the OM and giggling"


So, who really wants this person back in their life. And why do we keep trying to give them a pardon.
Childhood trauma is a given, but many people like my dad were orphans and raised on the street and became great parents and society members, with honor and values.

We keep talking about their behavior like a condition, as if its a sickness.
What if they are truly SOBs, I mean behind that sweet face and talking may lie a psycho who has been in hiding all along.

And I mention this because I read of other spouses displaying this selfish, non-empathizing behaviour.


I really like DnJs description of their personality being a ticking time bomb that was waiting in hiding and exploded in our face.

Anyone's thoughts would truly be appreciated.