Hi dnj my level of detachment,well somedays im good some days not so good but definitely no where as near as bad as I was a few months ago . I can remember back then what you told me “Finding detachment does lessen the severity and frequency of the cycling. However, it does not end the feelings. The point of detachment is to uncouple your emotional response from her - her emotions, her behaviour, your memories of her, etc... Your attachment is an irrational response to triggers regarding her. You need to rationalize these triggers. When that happens it places your responses in your intellectual control and not at the whim of your emotional self” never a truer word spoken how detached am I well I’m not in the same place as I was then each and every thought doesn’t trigger the anxiety but it’s still there albeit a lot less severe nowadays. On a scale I’d probably say I’m detached 7/10 . When I do cycle it’s not for as long as it used to be the thoughts flit in and out and then disappear . I must say that it’s still quite hard somedays but where as before I couldn’t control it now I seem to be able to tell myself to let it go and most of the time it goes I guess it’s like the mlc a slow process.indifference ,well I don’t know about that one I guess when I’m ready to totally emotionally switch off then hopefully I’ve reached indifference but I don’t think I’m there yet with that one . I think detachment is easier as I do not have contact with her so that makes it easier. You seem to think the crisis stands still but the change in behaviour ie totally avoiding me proves it moves on regardless.i don’t think time and space is a problem she’s got plenty of that.
