Thanks Sandi for the reply. My wife and I have been together for 20 years and married for 16 we have three children 7, 11 and 13. Approximately three or four years ago my wife’s mother got cancer. This really rattled my wife. After that she was obsessed about looking young, buying good clothes going out partying. When the bomb dropped she told me that when she went out partying that she would flirt with boys and I would give her the passion that she was looking for. She was speaking about her mortality and now we’re all going to die and that she just wants to experience life. She told me that she loves me and that she’s not a motive me she said she doesn’t know if romantic love for me she says she doesn’t have passion or desire for me. A month before the ball dropped she was still hugging me and holding me and telling me how much she loves me. With in the past four years she has racked up an enormous credit card bill she drinks heavily on weekends she got four tattoos the last tattoo was based on the poem do not go gentle into that dark Night. She told me that she’s going through a transition and that the person that she’s becoming doesn’t necessarily want to be married. My wife could never financially leave the house nor would she ever leave the children. This is a positive. My wife turned 40 in September. My wife was involved in emotional affair for two months, I read texts and ended the affair. She was pissed! I read a letter that she wrote the guy for closure it was the hardest thing ever to read the stuff that she was saying to him as if she was so in love with him made me sick to my stomach. In the letter she basically said how she doesn’t want to be with me anymore and we wrote so much of her history in terms of saying how she’s never been in love with me. She claimed that not taking my last name 16 years ago when we got married was must be a reason why. She claimed that having an affair before we were even engaged must be a reason why. She claimed that the distance that she has with my family 15 years ago must be a reason why. For the last 16 years we truthfully been a loving caring family. I don’t doubt for the last 23 years but she’s been feeling a certain way she’s just kept it hidden.
