Thanks Yorkie - that's what I thought. I have spoken to solicitors (three to be exact) and that was their view too. It is an 'iffy' area.
AS - it is his house because he is on the deeds. However, I paid the deposit and I have always paid the mortgage. In the eyes of the law this doesn't matter. He didn't earn as much as me and you support each other when you are married. He is entitled to half the house if/when the house is sold.
But there is a philosophical distinction between house and home. I house is something you own. It is a financial investment. A home is somewhere you live. It has emotional value. The wording I used when speaking to him was the wording suggested by all three of the solicitors. Your house. My home. It may not have a legal standing, but it has a ethical one.
As Yorkie says I cannot legally change the locks. However, I disabled the camera on Sunday (after I asked him to remove himself from he told me to do it myself) and, today I installed a lock on by bedroom door. You're right I should have done all this ages ago. Fear. Might be a small thing to you. But it is huge for me.
I cannot control much - he can come and go as he pleases, we have no regular childcare schedule to speak of (it is completely dependent on his roster) and I am a high earner so he pays me a nominal amount for the children - but I am getting on with my life regardless.
As always, I appreciate your words. Sometimes I come here just to moan about my H because I cannot do it IRL so apologize if it came across that way.
