Dude. 30... You still have plenty of time to meet the right person. I will be a single dad and 39 in a few months. I know how you feel though. I've had maybe 4 GF's 1 STBXW potentialy after 10 years. Makes you form a complex about yourself.and your self worth. ...I have never walked away from a relationship. Makes you wonder? Is it me?... I know that all too familiar feeling of overworked alone, tired frustrated, hated, and forgotten. I've been a lone wolf most of my life, using dating and relationships to socialize. You have to actively pursue who is right for you, and in order to to that you have to learn, go through the pain, and grow you.
My W is a good hearted person, but a hypocrite. I tried explaining to her that you don't find happiness outside of yourself last month, she disagreed. By my standards You don't leave a M because you are bored, you don't leave a marriage because you are seeking personal growth and independence, you don't leave a marriage looking for fulfillment, happiness, and purpose. You can do all these things in a marriage successfully if the other spouse is willing to grant that freedom. I've frequently said to W over last month that happiness comes from within, not the things, places, hobbies, or achievements around you. Although they are spirit and purpose boosters, and give life some meaning, once you accomplish your goals. Guess what? Time to reinvent yourself again, ask now what? And do it again. That's why they call it the pursuit of happiness.
Ironicly she just put up a FB post saying Happiness is a choice, not a result. That nothing outside of you can make you happy. You must choose to be happy, be gratetful, and then share that with the world. Which is what i was saying all along.
Go and find you, grow you, and have some fun in between, whether it be the sheets, or just casual dating. But learn the lessons and take it slow, and guard yourself if someone may not be good for you. Vulnerability is a good thing. But you have uou reveal it to the right person over a long time. Even then there are no guarantees in life.
