Tired of the drama...

[MarcPa]

I guess the other reason resentment is such a hard thing to get rid of is because we build our personal identities around certain core ideals, and many times resolving resentment involves admitting that we contribute to the problem ourselves, and we're not as 'great' as we think we are. "He's causing me pain, and I'm an angel, so he must be at fault." Often the reality we must acknowledge in order to fix the issue is directly counter-opposed to how we view ourselves in that specific context. That's where pride comes from. The trick is to know when we're cutting off our own nose to spite the face, and that's really hard because we intrinsically don't want to believe that we hurt others or cause harm. It's a coping mechanism that always works to preserve this 'personal fiction', and many times does so at the cost of our own happiness, and that of others. And the greater personal insecurity, the harder the mind works at preserving these 'fictions'. To make things worse, it's self reinforcing.