Moving on to the bright side Part 24

[DonH]

Very fascinating discussion - as many on this thread is (where the cool kids hang out - well mostly LOL) I find the best way, heck perhaps the only way, to address many things is to try to put yourself in the other person's shoes. In don't that I think I get where you are at and what you are thinking Joseph. I'm not sure it's as simple and as cut and clear as you are trying for it to be JuJu. Hopefully I can explain this.

For BS, I get the feeling that other than in bed, the doctor is kinda boring. I've thought this for a bit already and don't mean it to be mean at all, but even the two of you together seems to already be in a somewhat boring rut - and I place much of that on the doctor. I remember early on you tried to take her to ax throwing and got push-back. So now it's dinner and sex, dinner and sex, dinner and sex, dinner and sex. Unless it's a weeknight thing then it's just sex. It's hard to build a true R on that. It's fun and I'd be THRILLED to have it - not really wanting a huge R - but I also think back, way, way back, like 30-35 years back and it was when things got stale and boring that I found myself in a dinner and movie on a Sunday rut. You seem to be there early on. And she doesn't seem to have a lot else going on. That also tends to put more pressure on the other person.

I agree with the others, you are only at three months, just let this play out and show itself - and it will. You are doing a lot of thinking about the future rather than just enjoying the present. Something just tells me you like her, she's fun, there is really nothing wrong, she's just not "the one." And that's okay. Again, i could well be wrong, that's just how I see it.

JuJu, I think you just have not dated enough. I'd hate to see you change who you are to "play the game" but I do think you are onto some basic points. Guys will take advantage of - which is really not their goal but it just happens - women who they know are not going anywhere. One of the reasons I think that I enjoyed Wild Girl is she was a challenge. I get turned off rather quick if I sense I can do anything I want and the girl will still be there. "Whatever you want to do honey" it's just not fun. Anyhow, to my point JuJu, while I think it's great that you are trying to look at this, I really think casually dating a dozen guys will give you far more insight. Then blending the two together will likely give you the most intel.

There is also something to be said for the chemistry of it all. It's the part that really can't be explained. It's why I really enjoyed someone that I know was not good for me long term nor a long term match - yet the chemistry was there and therefore my enjoyment level was huge. Then I'll meet and date 6 others that might on paper be much better for me (or anyone) yet the chemistry is not there. I think with both of you it was as much the lack of chemistry as it is anything.