It's amazing how different divorce is in different states. In my state there is no preset calculation for spousal support/alimony though there is one for child support. Also, divorce is not necessarily linked to child custody and asset division. They are separate. The only requirement for a divorce is that both parties live apart for 1 year + 1 day. After that one party can file for divorce. As long as you have been separated at least a year and your paperwork is correctly processed through the judicial system, you can get your divorce. And you get the divorce whether or not you and your spouse have resolved any of the other issues arising from your separation, such as custody, spousal and child support, or distribution of property. I just wanted to post this so that anyone who is reading might know that divorce is very different state to state and that what is posted here for one person may not work for someone in another state. Also, no lawyers where I live do free consults. I just want other readers so be aware that this may or may not be available where you live. This is not to disparage the great advice from the vets but just as a PSA.
My husband is not looking for much in the way of child custody. He is asking for every other weekend and 2 weeks in the summer plus a few days at the holidays. Less than 90 overnights. (And yes my heart is breaking for my children who love their father so much). He wants me to buy him out of the house by paying his portion of the house equity from our investment accounts. Essentially a trade of house equity for investment account cash. Child support using the formula our state uses. He's very impersonal about all of it.
