I think you're right, Yorkie. I know a lot of what I am offering as support he is experiencing as pursuit. And that matters.
A weird day yesterday. He rang in the morning and asked if he could come over for breakfast and spend the day with his family. I said yes, and he turned up looking awful. I was in the kitchen and he came in and gave me a hug and we just carried on as if the night before hadn't happened. I gave him space and just got on with my life, and he seemed to want to be here resting and recovering. He'd have had more peace at home (I can stop smothering him, but I can't do anything about a puppy and the kids) but he seemed to really want to just be here. I left him to it mainly. It was comforting to me too, him being around. Sad when he left. But the more often I see him, the more I can see how utterly drained he is and how a lot of what is going on with him has nothing to do with me our our M. It does mean he has nothing in reserve to fix our R - and I do get that.
I need to think about my own needs more, I guess. Think about meeting them myself in some way. I am bad at that. And it's necessary.
Thank you for your bluntness Yorkie. Always welcome
