Hi everyone, I'm looking for some advice. This is my first time posting in this forum, so I will tell you a little about my current situation.
My H and I have been married for 11 years and have two wonderful children. We always had a pretty solid M and R. We literally were best friends. Now, I won't said that our M was perfect, we had small fights here and there but nothing out of the norm. When I had my son a year ago I developed PPD (Postpartum Depression) and when on and off for over 10 months. I felt alone and abandoned and I blamed my H for it. This took a toll on our R, but my H never gave up on me. At the same time my H was very stressed at work and started to show symptoms of depression himself. At the end of last year he found out awful things about his childhood (his childhood was pretty rough) and this added to his stress and my PDD made things worse for him emotionally. Right before the holidays he told me that he didn't believe that our R could improve and that he wanted out. He left our home that day and didn't hear from him in days. Next time I saw him he looked awful and he had been crying.That day he said that he loved me but was not in love with me...because if were if would have never left. Friends told me that he looked depressed at work and was always by himself. They were also worried that he would hurt himself. The times I've talked to him he has mentioned that he was fighting his demons and that he was very unhappy with his life. That he's lost and doesn't know who he is or what he wants anymore. He kept saying that he needed to be and find happiness and he didn't know if it was with me and the kids or not. He has also blamed me for his unhappiness and said that he has been miserable for years, pretty much all our M. At first I was in shock and I cried and begged him to come back, but after a few weeks I started doing things that made me feel better and started going to counseling. Thankfully I find myself in a much better place now. I have to for my children since they are very young and depend on me. My H also went to IC for a few weeks and I'm not sure if it helped him or made it worse. He has become a very angry individual and his only support right not it's his mother who also blames me for not being a good wife. He has cut communication with all his friends that have tried to get him come to his senses. He now says they are not real friends and has nobody to talk to. My H and I currently communicate via email, but only when it's something regarding our children, which unfortunately is not often. We haven't seen each other much since he left. He has been away and is returning soon.I'm sure if he will want to see the children once he returns. My D has been struggling with this and is confused by her father's behavior. She's at an age where she understands but doesn't really know what's going on (not sure if that even makes sense).
Has anyone been through this with little ones? Any advice?
