I dunno JB42 - the most recent posts I saw from you seemed to be from a pretty clear "no expectations" standpoint, which I was impressed with.
Cancelling at the last minute to anyone else in your life I would put into the category of "rude move". So the question from my perspective is this: Can you view W with the detachment and lack of expectations to the point where you can see her as "anyone else"? how strong is the pull she may or may not have over you? If you can honestly answer that question for yourself I think you can make your decision without fear.
I vote that if it seems like not a big deal to go to dinner and chat you do just that. You decide. If it gets uncomfortable or rude or in a place you don't want to be in you absolutely leave. And if she just needs to say her piece and have you listen and validate - does that actually hurt anyone?
That' last question I wrote was a real question to you. I think only you can answer it.
