Got a life, now what?

[97Hope]

Thanks. Is it weird that it's comforting knowing that someone feels sad for you? It did kind of punch me for a second. When I say that he was still wearing it, I had a talk with myself, and will probably continue to do so. I need to be ok no matter what he does next. Yes, I am definitely taking care of myself!! I sat on the couch most of the day saturday and it was GLORIOUS!! ha. I needed to rest, so I did. zero guilt!

My biggest struggle, STILL, is not allowing what he says give me hope, or take it away. Definitely a work in progress.

Was weird last night. He was sooooo complimentary and flirty. He has days like that where he just can't take his eyes off of me, and gets almost a little gropey! IDK. Try not to let it build me up, because those falls when he does something weird can't break me. I spent too much time tossed and turned by it.

I am happy to say that the waves are smaller as time goes on, and they aren't as scary as they used to be.

He's out of town until Saturday and I'm actually liking the break! When he left, he was sad. S17 noticed and I didn't comment. I am really and truly happy right now. I'm liking this feeling too much to be hoovered back into drama.

He has also initiated two R talks lately. I validated and only spoke when he asked me a question, but I don't really feel it's helpful to R talk anymore. Either he wants a R with me or he doesn't, but re-hashing it doesn't help, I think.
Anyone have any advice on that? I know Michelle says to let them initiate R talks, but do we get to a point where we just say "enough". I don't want to just listen anymore. I know you are/were unhappy. I'm sorry that you feel that way. I'm not in that place anymore and I want to focus on my future. with or without you. I'm done rehashing the past.

Thanks for reading and walking this road with me. Take care of yourselves, friends!