Persistent Endurance (Part 2)

[curtis7]

However, remember, believe nothing they say. My W had a way of twisting other people's words to fit her narrative. If someone told her "You should work as hard as you can to save your marriage, unless there are lines crossed that you just can't forgive."

Her version would be: "So-and-so said I shouldn't work to save the marriage because you are mean and controlling and those are lines you crossed that I just can't forgive."

Notice how she focused like a laser on the piece she wanted to her, and completely ignored the part she should have paid heed to, and even completely ignored the spirit of the advice! That is a mindset of a WW. So while there are no doubt people that told her that, based on her trumped up, overblown version of the state of the MR, there were also no doubt people that told her she should try to save her MR but she wasn't listening, or heard what she wanted to hear.

Steve, believing nothing they say is the golden rule when dealing with a WW. It’s sad to say but I can validate, make that verify, that on almost a daily basis.

I followed R2C’s recommendation and said “W, the other day, you asked me to be honest with you about whether I was on a date and I was. I would like you to be open and honest with me. Will you do that?”

W said okay and I asked her if she was interacting with other men. I told her I’m not going to judge and that I just want to understand. She said not sexting like she was before, but there are a few that keep contacting her from the dating app and won’t leave her alone. She said the relationship with 25 year old OM1 is completely over.

Case in point, she doesn’t seem to be engaging in the full blown back and forth sexting to the absolute extreme of describing the erotic details. But, she is heavily flirting and telling OM2 how bad she wants him and to be with him along with exchanging partially nude photos. Oh, and OM1 is texting her again too.

Half truths and lies are the norm. I have no doubt she is ready for all out GGW when she moves out tonight or tomorrow into the separation house. The feedback I’ve received about W’s move out to have sex with OM couldn’t be more true.

The question remains how long the LBH is willing to wait in limbo to see if she starts to come out of the fog. Steve, I know you recommend a year of DB. Don’t know if I can make it that long. Nevertheless, I’m not going to waste my life sitting around for the time I do stand. I am GAL and making my life great without her.

I was curious if anyone can recommend some sitches to read of WW that have moved out and in active PA’s that R? I could really use some success stories to give me hope.