Thought I'd hop back on here and give a quick(ish) update and ask for some guidance on something that came up. I'm doing great! I've completely disengaged from personal conversations with the STBXW (what a hurdle). I'm getting my life together - making and achieving goals, getting out of the house with friends and/or my kids, going and making new friends, and pursuing my best life. I can honestly say I'm happier than I've been in a long time. I attribute this to not letting myself be complacent in how I show up in the world like I was in the M.
The issue that came up is that when I have been talking to my WW about kids or finances (I try and limit even those interactions by not leaving anything to question, but they still have to happen on occasion), she has been trying to extend the conversation, which I promptly end. I don't think that it's really temp checking, but maybe it is? That in itself is not the issue, the issue is that she called the other day to talk to S3 (she's on vacation and I agreed to let her have nightly convo's with S3); she was crying when I answered and I asked her if she's okay to talk to S3. That's when she started telling me that she feels extremely guilty (she did not specify about what and I did not ask) and that she's sorry that she never agreed with me when I said we needed to do things as a couple. It was a blind-side to me (even though I left that door open by asking if she was okay) and I didn't know what to say so I validated her feelings and told her to focus on things to be grateful about. She said she wants to talk when she gets back. I ended the conversation there and let her talk to S3 after she gathered herself.
I haven't told anyone about this conversation. She said she wants to have dinner together with the boys (not the first time she's offered, I've declined every time as I'm not interested and I think it would confuse S3) when she gets back and asked me what I wanted as a souvenir from her trip. I politely declined the souvenir, though she stated that she is getting me something, even though I declined. I haven't answered her yet about the dinner.
Should I have this nebulous "talk" with her? In all of our recent conversations, I've had a clear agenda for where I want it to go (pass the phone to S3, get X finance taken care of, hash out childcare for whatever date, etc.) so I'm not sure where I stand on it. I doubt she wants to reconcile, but she wants something. Any advice, 2x4's, etc. are welcome.
