Not "our", this is all about you now. Let her live a saga while you live a life of incredible awesomeness.
AS, good correction. This is my time to reclaim who I am and the man I want to be going forward.
I appreciate the encouragement. I have noticed over the past few months that the small close circle that I have shared some of details of my sitch with have quickly offered suggestions to give up on my MR due to W’s behavior. Honestly, while I know they just want to make me feel better, it doesn’t align with my ultimate goal of R. These POVs are probably not much different than the influences W was following when deciding to BD, IHS, and now physically S. Definitely the biased shoulders. My W has made comments that several have told her to walk away as well although she has zero interest in R right now.
I find that reassurance from members here as well as my inner circle are extremely helpful in giving me strength and supporting my belief to continue standing.
One thing I've learned following these sitches is no one is more committed to trying to save the MR than the LBS.
However, remember, believe nothing they say. My W had a way of twisting other people's words to fit her narrative. If someone told her "You should work as hard as you can to save your marriage, unless there are lines crossed that you just can't forgive."
Her version would be: "So-and-so said I shouldn't work to save the marriage because you are mean and controlling and those are lines you crossed that I just can't forgive."
Notice how she focused like a laser on the piece she wanted to her, and completely ignored the part she should have paid heed to, and even completely ignored the spirit of the advice! That is a mindset of a WW. So while there are no doubt people that told her that, based on her trumped up, overblown version of the state of the MR, there were also no doubt people that told her she should try to save her MR but she wasn't listening, or heard what she wanted to hear.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
