Wrote a big long post this morning and it never got posted. I will try to remember what I wrote...lol.
Bo - I remember feeling what you are feeling. I grew up with two parents who stayed together and it was my plan to give my children the same gift. Unfortunately, it wasn’t only up to me and my STBXH’s values are very different from mine. He never had that so he has no idea what he missed growing up. Looking back on all of the mistakes and dumb decisions he has made, he should really wonder about that. But he doesn’t... he just keeps doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. Anyway...regardless...all you can really do is make sure that when you have your kids, they have you 100%. Eventually you will get used to it and even come to appreciate when you have some time on your own. Also...try not to pay too much attention to your W’s threats. They are just that.
Had a great weekend with my SD19. She and I spent most of Sunday together and I spoiled her a little bit. She saw her dad briefly on Sunday when he dropped off the twins. It was sad. He didn’t hug her and barely spent any time talking to her. I know it is because he knows she is mad at him. In his family, when someone is mad at you, you avoid them and do the mental Olympics required to make it all about them and nothing to do with you and your behaviour. You definitely don’t address it head on. It is really, really sad. She wants a relationship with him so bad but is tired of being the one who reaches out. I worked so hard to try to promote and support a relationship between them and he has completely ruined it. Sigh...
Facebook guy played an April Fool’s joke on me today. Sent me a text that he was at the hospital cause his truck had caught on fire on the way to work and he had burned his right arm and half the hair on his head trying to put it out. It was so random and realistic the way he worded it, I totally fell for it. He is supposed to be coming for dinner on Wednesday. He seems a bit less communicative the last couple of days. I really don’t know what I am doing with him. I’m not sure who could be with someone like him longterm. He seems absolutely prettified of being still for more than 20 minutes. I’m surprised he sat on the beach with me for the 45 minutes he did. It is just so strange in some ways. Almost as strange as the fact that we have spent 16 hours total together and he hasn’t even tried to kiss me. He keeps talking abou things we can do in the summer together. It is all very confusing. Trying not to worry about it too much but I’m starting to try not to like him too much cause I just have no idea where this is going and I don’t want to have any expectations.
Thanks for the warning Grace. Finally decided to block Tinder guy. Despite me clearly telling him I wasn’t going to be his girlfriend, he just wasn’t getting it. Kept sending me weird hard-to-understand texts and calling me all these overly familiar pet names. Definitely stalker material. I called my cell provider to make sure I am unlisted and then blocked him. He lives 45 minutes away in another town so hopefully that will be it.
Traded some texts with STBXH today. He has been friendlier lately. Maybe because he can tell I have moved on? Not sure but it bodes well for our kids if we can remain cordial and cooperative with one another. Apparently his house inspection did not go well. Hoping whatever is wrong can be fixed as I really would like him to be close by for the sake of the kids.
Anyway... hope this gets posted cause I’m going to sleep now. Love and (((HUGS))) to you all.
