Dealing with a complex MLC and/or Wayward Wife

[P_Jam]

Thoughts?

(Me slapping my forehead)
If she asks:
After everything that has happened, I need time and space to think about what I want in the future.

LOL!!

I guess I just can't seem to comprehend how the soft 'mystery' approach is better than the in your face tough love approach.

Although I do understand now how/why not to say things like: This is your relationship to save.. etc.. This makes sense to me.

As far as the other specific comments you made to my earlier post (Thanks!). I know from her perspective that definitely could be how she is taking it. That being said I"m not sure what else I should have done. I was planning to get the house painted this year anyway (things just worked out to jump on it now), we already had the light I was 1. just keeping busy 2. taking the leadership to get things done (some 180). Damned if you do, damned if you don't. so I feel okay that I "DID".

Nanny.. probably the wrong term. It's more about having my own resources for babysitters or people to help me pick up the kids from school daycare when I'm tied up with work. My W has been very protective of who watches our kids (as I have one with unique issues (not quite special needs) but high risk allergies). So our child care has only revolved around her family. So I needed to get my own resources set up.

in short.. yes too little too late (she has said this once to me when I had a conversation about her going out) basically I said I didn't care she can do what she wants. But generally I still feel that she should see some of my 180's even if it is too late.