I really hope she turns it around but I think you really need to prepare for the worst. Its an unfortunate situation but as LH says it has to get worse before it gets better. There is also really no logic to the situation. What wife would want to give up her family, her house, her husband, etc. to go live in a apartment to go have an affair??? To her it makes sense but to you its not logical.
When I started to believe that it was more about her than me it helped. Not going to lie though I cried my eyes out, could not sleep at night, and didn't eat for over a week. I couldn't even mow the yard without breaking down. In many ways it felt like a death. I remember hanging on every word, not being able to understand how she could do this to the kids. 2 years later I still have no answers but I am not the only one either.
Just know it gets better, eventually you hate feeling like crap, you will experience every emotion you can think of and swing back and forth between them all. You can hope all you want just don't let that hope stop you from moving forward. You do have a long road ahead of you and you will get tired of analyzing her every move.
It is a very good thing that you stopped snooping.
When LH said you will be fine either way he mean that whether you recon with your W or not he knows that YOU will ne just fine either way.
Just remember you are the prize and you don't want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you.
