I don't think you need a 2x4 you just are still trying to rationalize and understand how this happened and how in the heck you got to this place. What your going through is perfectly normal. From my experience though you will probably never be able to understand it. I still don't understand mine but I have come to accept it.
The thing is Divorce does not discriminate between those who are wealthy, middle class or poor. It very well could have nothing to do with you.
The one thing you are guilty of is trying to place tangible items on the reason why she should stay. Trips, cars, houses, etc. Do you really want her to stay because of those things? You want her to stay because of the love she has for you not what material items or status she stands to lose.
First, thanks for your reply.
No, I do not want her to stay for those things. Its not that she can't survive and even thrive without me. It's only hope that the lifestyle she is currently living does not fulfill her and that along with all of the other 'pinches' (space, security, family, money) causes her to break the affair fog. I'm only implying/thinking that the rush/feeling of the affairs and the lifestyle doesn't really go on that long because of all of this (including the big one of loss of marriage). This is coupled with the thought/believe that our life/relationship really was not THAT bad. And that her happiness is fully in her control (without girls gone wild lifestyle) - with me or even with somebody else.
You're right - I'm grasping for her to find some logic in her situation. That would seemingly make it easier even if she didn't chose me again. At least then I could better understand the reason(s) this is happening.
H(me:) 44 W: 45 T: 16yrs M: 13 S: 9 S: 6 Pre BD (not really recognized by either) 8/18 PA 11/18 PA suspected 12/22/18 (Denied) PA confirmed 12/28/18 PA #2 (Different) 2/16/19 S: 4/7/2019
