Hit by the dreaded ILYBNILWY part 2

[mikeyb]

This past weekend was really tough. I did get out, spent Saturday at busch gardens with my mom then went to my parents house on Sunday and spent the day there. Yesterday I was home all day, taking care of household chores and played some video games with a close friend. Doing all that was great, but coming home / being home in an empty house really brought me down (I did have my dogs who stayed really close to me through all this). I haven't talked to my W now for 6 days. She came home briefly yesterday to swap vehicles and grab a few things in the morning after she got off work. The dogs woke me up when she arrived but I didn't say anything to her and she didn't say anything to me and like that she was gone again.

I have so many different feelings right now it's crazy. From feeling betrayed, lied to, led on, insecure, lonely, you name it. And somehow, with her putting me through all of this pain I still don't want to give up on her, and at the same time I can see some of the pain I put her through, but I never did anything like this to her (Although she did accuse me when I found out about her EA of going on her facebook and looking at woman on the other side of the country, which for one, I never had access to her facebook except when we needed to reset her account and she needed my help, and two, why would I even do something like that on HER facebook????). BTW she has also on the night of finding out about the EA she deleted her facebook account completely.

Anyway, I scheduled today off last week to try and get some things in order and run some errands, the W doesn't know I'm off since we've had no contact so who knows if she's going to come by today to take care of the dogs or not.