I have really enjoyed reading your updates! your energy is so positive and balanced. ... While I imagine it was hurtful to learn of the A, I am also glad that he cannot disillusion you any longer. He has strung you up in his web of lies for too many years. No more! I love that you are seeing him for what he is and taking your power back.
I think it's great that you are talking to other men and possibly open to dating. You seem to have a healthy reasonable attitude about it and that is what matters most.
Someone started a thread recently about dating before D and I had to really hold myself back from responding. There were several different arguments -- not directly related to one another in context -- and someone even quoted the bible. All hyperbole. Each one of us here has to decide what is best for ourselves, and for our kids, and no one should preach any moral high grounds! I think it's needless to say that if we have a new BD happen and then we run to another person as escape, or if we introduce our kids to another partner soon, that neither situation is ideal.
You seem very mindful about your choices. I look forward to reading more! ... If I could go back and do things differently, I think I would have dated even tho I did want to R. It would have allowed me more fun and easier detachment. I just wasn't in that mind set back then. Come to think of it, one of the reasons that H did his fast turnaround, was that he was afraid I was dating and that he would lose me permanently (or as plan B). Sigh.
Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
