[DonH]

That made much more sense now JuJu - much more. Of course, there are always two sides to every sitch - and his might be far different. For example you "almost" missed a flight - but you didn't. You made it, yeah there was stress. People just all look at things like this differently. I'm rarely if ever late and rarely if ever early. If you say be there at 7 PM I'll be there at 7 PM. Now some people would start to panic at 6:45. When we went on the cruise the wife of the keyboard player - also leader of the band - insisted we get there TWO HOURS early. The flipping airport was not even open as we sat their at 3:45 AM waiting for people to show up behind the counter to check us in for our 6:00 AM flight. To her - almost missing the flight would have been showing up at 5 AM which is totally what I would have done.

But, that's where my benefit of the doubt starts to end. People sleeping through alarms like that is just not normal. I'm putting on my medical hat now - it's just not normal. I know you have suspected or perhaps even confirmed alcohol or possible drug use and THIS just SCREAMS of it. Something is up with that for sure. Yet, he seemed to get away with it - in part because people let him get away with it. If this was me and he had a history of being late, the fishing boat would have left and he would have been waving from the shore. That's the only way people change their behavior - is when consequences are put on them. And his way of not having that happen is to treat the person applying those consequences through hell so they were afraid to do it again. See, I'm not that guy. Get mad at me, I don't care. I have you a 15 minute grace period - you were not there - we left.

The thing is JuJu, the more you talk about this and reveal the details, the more I'm certain you did the right thing with your ex. I'm really wondering if it should not have been done much sooner? Or perhaps you never should have started with him? Not sure. I always try to put myself in the other person's shoes. If this were me and if I really was in love with you and missed you, I'd at least give contacting you a try. The fact he is not - no matter the reason/excuse further convinces me that you made the right decision. Again, I'm not saying he's a bad guy. He's just not your match. More-over, I continue to maintain you did this very well. If anything, you hung on longer than could be expected. He didn't rush to judgement. You have him opportunity. Perhaps when you started not inviting him places was the time to start thinking, hmmmmmm, this is not working. And you were - you were even telling us about it.

In all, I think you handled all of this really well. You learned some things about what you do and do not want. You (hopefully) had some fun. No real damage was done - that I'm aware of anyhow. This really is a no harm, no foul. You dated, and that's it. Next. Use anything you can to make changes for the next time. I think you should be very proud of yourself. Stop second guessing. And I'm a tough grader so hopefully it means something when I say, I think you did well - for whatever it's worth - that's my input!