Good point about the threat, thank you. I'll have to think carefully about how I phrase it. And he thinks he IS being honest with me by saying he's still confused and might not want to be married. Well, he clearly is confused, that's true, but I disagree with him not wanting to be married. Well, I think judging by his behaviour rather than his words.
He's said a few times when I told him how much I hate lying to/evading my parents that I should tell them to 'get their support'. But I don't think he's considered the impact that will have on what they think of him, and he has a very fragile ego. My mum would completely lose it. And I don't want her support, I have my friends and my IC for that. You can see where the whole distancing thing comes from, lol. So I would prefer they didn't know until this thing resolves one way or the other. They might not even see him, I told them I might go and visit them when they're travelling round Wales and Scotland, and they will want to see the kids a few times but I probably could just pretend everything is ok or say that dh is having real problems coping with work and the commute (both true) and leave out that I don't stay over at his flat. I really would prefer not to have to actively lie to them though, and the kids will let drop about the flat at the least. And then there's a whole new can of worms...
I think I will discuss this with my IC and also leave it till a while into April. No massive rush, I might not even need to discuss it till May.
