If you follow my thread you know about a week ago I mentioned that H joked about looking for a job in another state.
Well this morning (early) this morning he decides he now wants to talk to me about this.
Apparently some new positions just came open. There’s a few here locally and some in other states. He comes to me and says he thinks he wants to apply to the positions.
My response was, if that’s what you want to do I won’t stand in your way. He then goes on and explains that the positions are only 2-year assignments so it’s possible he would only be gone for 2 years. Again, I said if that’s what you want, I won’t stand in your way.
He then ask, so what does that mean for us? I said it means that I won’t put my life on hold while you move somewhere and do only God knows what.
He then says, what makes you think I would go somewhere and do something inappropriate. My response was that the trust has been broken multiple times and hasn’t been rebuilt yet. I told him if I can’t trust you locally, what makes you think I’m going to trust you living somewhere else.
So he then ask what does this mean for our house. I told him I’m not sure but what I’m not going to do is take a huge financial hit because he decided to move across country.
I wrapped the conversation up with telling him, that If he decides that he wants to relocate, I’ll wish him the best but I won’t be waiting for him. I told him that’s not an ultimatum, it’s a fact. It’s not me telling him what he should do, it’s me telling him what I won’t do.
The crazy thing is he seemed shocked at my stance. But I’m dead serious. There is no way I’m staying the faithful wife while he moves and does whatever he wants.
As he was taking I did validate his feelings. But I didn’t mince words. Was I wrong? Did I handle it ok?
Original BD: 10/26/2017 PA: 10/2017 - 11/2017 Second BD: 09/15/2018 Currently: IHS M: 42 H: 45 S: 22 lives on his own D: 18 away at college S: 15 still lives at home - the only child we share together
