she asked me if I was worried how this would affect my job, because I teach morality / ethics. I told her “I’m not the one asking for a divorce.”
Who teaches AA- reformed alcoholics. Who counsels drug users- former addicts. Who better to teach morality and ethics than someone who has been through this and had to apply high moral standards to their behavior in the face of someone who has none.
lol at the ring flying off. Glad you found it.
Bo keep being an awesome dad and Christian. Be the shining example of a proud Catholic Man living life to the fullest and in his faith.
I may have shared this with you before... in my past life I wanted to be a teacher. I wanted to be an art professor. Teachers were so influential in my life. A few of them were more than mentors. One lady became a friend of my mother and she became a spiritual influence in our lives. She was my first IHP teacher in middle school. My 3rd grade teacher cared for me as her son, she told her xH who was a cop to watch out for me because I would always walk home for many blocks. Back then my mother didn't know about the bus system... The teacher's xH put me in my first football team and would take me to school in his police car some days. My high school art teacher helped me get my art scholarship and helped me get out of some really bad trouble. She was like a grandmother to me.
I can imagine what you are going through as a man in your profession. Around so many women, yet feeling lonely? I can empathize working in an office full of women where I am. It feels good to just talk to someone and not have marital problems be the main subject all the time. I can imagine teaching some days would feel like a thankless job and then compound that with your W crazy talk at home. I wanted to let you know there will be kids out there you will affect in a positive way and they will never forget like I've never forgotten. Don't let anyone take away from who you are as a person.
I agree with what Sandi said about being equally yoked. I didn't like that phrase when I was younger, much younger, but as I got older I saw the wisdom in it. Your faith is part of your identity. Don't sacrifice that or lose it. Don't compromise it.
I was raised as Apostolic Pentacostal but when I got older I stopped going because I didn't believe in everything that went on in the church at that time. My W is a non practicing Catholic. I am mixed Asian. W is Vietnamese and many are either Catholic or Buddhist. I was not going to marry anyone Buddhist although my mother did convert way back. Was funny seeing her pray to God but on Chinese New year she would burn money. She was confused. I have seen Buddhist women convert to Catholicism and I think they too are confused. W and I never made religion or politics get in the way. We never pressed into going to Catholic church except for holidays sometimes. I now wonder if she would have liked for me to go more often or to truly convert. Sometimes I would have liked for her to show she was more spiritual.
I know having a partner who is the same faith as me doesn't guarantee eternal bliss, but if I had to do it all over again, I'd find someone who is a believer as much as I am, at least. BUT.... this isn't about finding the right partner. This is about YOU. Sure there are some 180s we can all do, but those are mostly behaviors we should continue to strive in getting better at anyways. You don't need to change who you are, not what's at your core. You can always build upon it though and I know you will.
What do the kids say these days? Don't get "lost in the sauce."
H 49 , W 47 T 23, M 17 S11, S5 BD: 7/18 IHS: 7/18 - 3/19 Physically Separated: 3/19-4/19 Piecing: 4/19 - Current
