Your agitation is jumping right off the page. H is stuck, and therefore you believe you are as well. The house is a pivotal point in all of this, the sale of it necessary for you and him.
I do believe you are correct he requires you to lead any conversations regarding “adult” business, the house sale definitely qualifies. However, his is afraid of any conversation. So, going at this directly will most likely push him into hiding.
I do wonder about the need to get out of limbo. House? Price? Market falling? Fear?
You do know your situation best.
To me you need to lead a conversation without discussing it, to keep H from being afraid. Ask him questions, then tell him what to do. No real conversation, just getting the information and direction to him.
Maybe: H, can you tell me what the house is worth? Perhaps he gets you the answer. Thank you, I would like to get my half so I can move to be close to D. (See if he responds) H, how do I go about doing that?
A question he can answer, then a direction and statement of your desired action. No real conversation. Nothing about the reasons, just the result. An irrational person might even be able to follow along with a plan that way, especially if he is the one who answered, and crafted it.
Just a few ideas. I find getting buy in is necessary for success.
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
