Yesterday I had a thought that made me sad. I thought...maybe just maybe...H has lost it for me just as he said. Maybe he no longer loves me. Sure he cares about me but he doesn’t love me. I’m not sure a M can survive if one partner doesn’t love the other one. I mean he tells me that he loves me. Not daily like he used to but at least once a week. It’s crazy how he used to tell me he loved me everyday and now I hear it once (if I’m lucky) maybe twice a week.
Living - you know what folks here would say about your paragraph above about your H? I think you do know...
Those are his feelings... right now. If his feelings did change it means they changed once. They can change again.
My personal belief in your sitch is that H simply does not have access to his emotions right now. Not the full range, anyway. He wants to feel love - he is maybe even really trying to feel love - but he just can't get there. That's what depression can do.
Thanks for chiming in Yail. I’m glad I logged in today.
I’m positive that you’re right about my H feelings. I read up some more on male menopause and my H definitely checks off a lot of those symptoms. I know he’s suffering from a combination of that and mid-life crisis. Sometimes I need to re-read information to remind myself that he is indeed going through something. It helps me have compassion and empathy for him.
I’m sure he loves me in some sort of way right now but like you said he’s having a tough time getting there and even showing the love.
Day by day I’m getting better at not ignoring him but I’m just not letting his mess consume me anymore. I get up and go about my day and I’m thankful that I’ve gotten to this place.
Original BD: 10/26/2017 PA: 10/2017 - 11/2017 Second BD: 09/15/2018 Currently: IHS M: 42 H: 45 S: 22 lives on his own D: 18 away at college S: 15 still lives at home - the only child we share together
