Btrow, thanks for the reply. I don't think I would've played it any differently if I had more mixed emotions. Emotions are one thing, facts are another. The facts of the situation haven't changed. Emotions don't make a great compass.
As for how I've interacted, I found a post of mine from a few years ago that sums it up pretty well. I think my full post and the replies on this page (page 2 of 10 on this thread) are relevant:
I can tell you that I have stuck to that outlook religiously. It's been over 4 years now since I've truly interacted with her. These contacts back and forth regarding the children are extremely short, business like, and emotionless. Hers have varied widely from hostile, to threatening, to mournful, to raging, to snipy, etc, etc. But she can't start a fight if I don't fight back. Not only has my approach avoided anything escalating (which is a great gift for the children, that I am not at war with their mother), but it has made moving on so easy because I feel like I haven't actually talked to her in over 4 years. As far as I'm concerned she was murdered by my XW in 2014. I mourned her the way I would if she was dead. And I keep as emotionally distant from XW as possible.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
