I know that convincing, manipulating, arguing, reminding of the good times, giving ultimatums, telling and acting and showing how unhappy I am, begging, demanding - all of that stuff - does not work. If it was going to work, it would have done because I've tried it HARD for a long time.
I read somewhere that the greatest gift you can offer to a partner is taking care of your own spiritual, physical and emotional needs, so you can be their intimate companion, but not a burden. I've been really bad at doing that, so I am working on that. I hope it will attract him, but I'm doing it because I have to, and because I want to be happy.
I think a lot of the 180s should be about supporting yourself, correcting your flaws, living your best life, and hoping that your spouse will notice and get interested, but doing them mainly for yourself. Taking the pressure off them to meet your needs, when they are probably struggling and suffering themselves.
