^^^ remember this ^^^ because right now it is your truth.
You are a fixer but you can't fix him. Everything you do right now is going to push him away. He knows he matters to you but right now, he simply does not care . This [censored], but for him, right now, your love is not enough. He is looking for something or someone to complete him, but he cannot be complete, because that comes from inside.
So, if everything you do is going to push him away, then it doesn't matter what you do. And what you should be doing is fixing you. That doesn't mean rant and rave and get angry and tell him exactly what you think. It means showing him compassion and kindness, but at the same time be a little selfish. Concentrate on what you need to heal.
Think of it this way. Leave a place for him at the table but get to a point where it doesn't effect you if he doesn't come home to eat. One day you will either discover that you've stopped leaving a place for him, or that he is, once again, sitting there enjoying dinner with his family. Live your life like that. Let him know that he is welcome but make your decisions yourself.
You are enough. Don't let him make you doubt that.
