Quote: He called me at work today to see if I was mad at him. I said no, that I was just sad. He said why? What did I do last night? I said nothing, I just feel sad cause of us sometimes okay? He said that I slammed the car door when I left. I said oh, I didn't realize I did that, sorry. He asked me how come I didn't send him an email yet? (lately I have been sending him emails when I am upset or need to respond to his questions/remarks.) I told him I wasn't planning on sending him one. He said oh, I was expecting you too. I said how come you only call me now when I am upset? You don't call me to talk anymore huh? He didn't really answer, just told me to cheer up and he would call me later. I said okay bye.
It seema you are doing a good job at detaching. I really don't have any advice on that subjet becasue it is something I haven't grasped yet.
Quote: What do you think? I know this is not d'bing. But I really think he is asking for some kind of direction or suggestion on what to do. I think he needs to know what the consequences of a divorce will be. He has been avoiding facing reality and has admitted that to me.
Maybe I should ask his mom to tell him this instead of me, he values her opinion very highly. I just have to make sure she doesn't get mad and start screaming at him like she has in the past.... (He would not think that I put her up to it, she knows what is going on, she lives with us, also he has called her when he is drunk and tells her stuff. I have told her to back off for the past few weeks cause she is putting too much pressure on him.)
Should I wait to have this conversation with him (or through his mom)? I know I am not supposed to put any pressure on him, but I can't let him continue thinking that everything will be okay for us even if we are not together. (he is constantly saying that, and saying he hopes we can be friends cause he needs me in his life)
I know that it goes agianst DBing but you know your H better then anyone. If you think he needs to see what it would be like without you. Show, don't set down and talk. Put it in action. Quite paying for the bills that are not necesy. When he ask say something about needing to save money for you and your son,(you may or may not want to add that he might not be in pic, in the furtue.) Stop doing the grass, picking things up form the stores. Stop taking care of him and let him see what all he will have to do.
Tell his mom that if he says anything to her about. For her to suggest that you are trying to take care of you and your son, he will have to strat to take care of himself.
I know that this is not comeing out as nice as I want it to sound. But hopefuly you are getting the idea. And I will proubly be kick of the site for this. But honey you have to think of yiu and your son.
