I think you done a great job on the queatsion. And it sounds like a postive step that H is asking how you would treat him if he came back home. You have anwsner his question about hating the Ow way better than I would have. It seems to me H maybe wanting to come home, but is still a little scared to let go of the Ow. You might have a little bit of a wait. But while that is going on keep up the DBing and working on you.
Quote: Then he told me that OW is upset at him cause he is with me tonight. I said but you and I live together, where does she expect you to be? I am your wife. He said that we are supposed to be separated now, and she gets mad when he spends time with me. (obviously she doesn't realize that she is the outsider in his life, his home is with me and our family, she is just the distraction....imagine what she would do if she found out we are constantly ML, cuddle all night and take showers together? I thought she knew the sitch, Oh the temptation to tell her!! - don't worry, I won't, at least not yet...)
It is great that she is jealouse that he spends time with you. I thnk if she knew the sitch, it wouldn't sit good with her. But it seems like you knew what the frist thing out of my mouth would be. But the at least not yet, kinda makes me nervouse. Don't go and tell her about what you and H dose in the heat of the monent.
Now matter when it comes out. It can't be from you or it will work against all the great work. When the time is right your H will probly tell her and her recation will be the last straw. But then agian he might break it off with out her ever knowing about. But If it does come out it can't be from you.
Quote: On the down side, I know that he is not ready to let her go, this is the 3rd fight they have had in the past few weeks. But he keeps going back to her. I know he will see her again tommorow, and they will probably make up. But their relationship is built on a foundation of deceit, and now as reality is starting to set in, and she is starting to make 'relationship demands' it's beginning to crumble.
I am just going to keep d'bing, stop pressuring him, and let her drive him back to me.
Keep this in mind becuse it might take a little time. But keep up your plan. The more she demands and the more postive stuff you do. It should take H long to see that he can't have it both ways. And coming home to his famliy will keep looking beter and better.
I am so happy for you. It is a great step if you ask me.
