Thanks AS , I do need to get better at the validation part . I was caught off guard. My boundary will be “ I am not going to live with someone who is actively involved with someone else , if it continues from here in any form then I will arrange for the sale of our house and for us to separate fully . “ I do mean it and I want to ensure she understands it fully . Fixing the house up had many benefits, increased the value , occupied my mind and after a good job done I always feel a lot better and stronger.
So she said she was going to go and stay the night at her cousins, yeah right . I encouraged her and say she should as I am sure she has been stressed recently. She said her cousin would only respond when she felt like it so it is up in the air . I said cool , I am going to go and do some shopping and maybe meet up with someone later. So I guess I have to judge the timing of the boundary soon .
I feel a lot better and I can only win each way tbh . If she’s lying, then we are finished, if not then lots of dbing for me to go . There is a good chance she is just stringing me along until she can be in a better position, we will see .
