I agree w/OneArt's posting. He's trying to reconnect, but is still having issues with confusion. Until he reconciles his issues, he'll continue to circle around for a bit longer and hopefully, he will get some help w/his depression.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
