Finding the Balance then Tipping the Scale (3)

[Adam04]

You seem to be handling her family well. Just remember to be careful. Blood is thicker than water. I still have a relationship with the ex-inlaws, but we do not talk about XW or the D. They are now just good friends

Thanks TF, I have been taught very early in life that blood is indeed thicker than water. I've had some very tough lessons from that. I've got a very impulsive, hard headed brother. I've fought friends as a kid because I had to stand up for him vs them when it was his fault. I have an expectation that families stick up for their own no matter what.

I know whatever I say or bring up, it will find its way to W and I don't want that to happen. I'm not trying to convince the inlaws to hear my side. It's a juggling act though for sure. The older SIL had been sharing some of her issues with the new R and I have to be careful saying how I understand from my own relationship issues.

I'm still angry, hurt, upset, and disgusted with the way things happened with W. At the same time, I need to be the best me while standing for the MR. A lot of it is walking this journey alone, if you will. There is no one I can share my day with or confide in like I used to with her. I'm still trying to find me, trying to balance this all out.

TF, my in laws have always been super close and super kind. They love my boys and will pick them up on their days off and spend time with them, taking them out and doing things with them. I chose my BIL who is my friend as the godfather of my older son, and the youngest SIL as godmother to my younger son.

It's strange... the older SIL I was chilling with the last couple days is married to a guy who has 2 boys. They live right next to the xW so the boys can travel back and forth easily. The H is friends with his xW's H and last night the xW new H gave 4 basketlball tickets to the old H, my SIL new H. Was near courtside and they all had a good time. I'll also say it here again, SIL goes on vacation with her xH and his new W as well for the kids.

Last couple of weeks I've taken my boys out to eat and ask W along, which she hasn't declined a free meal yet. Tonight is no exception. She told me about her problems with the new house, her work, and we talked and I validated. We went out for Tex Mex and had a couple of margaritas.

We discussed more things about the house with the negotiations and looking at what needed to be fixed. We agreed there for the most part on everything.