No, he knows that I see an IC but says he's 'thinking' when I ask him what he's doing on his end. Oh well, we are all different. I think the thought of addressing his abandonment in IC would be very painful to him, so I assume that's why he's not doing that, though he did say maybe to my suggestion of IC when he first left so I won't assume anything.
I can see he's doing his work however he's doing it, his actions are 180s on some stuff he used to do. At first I thought he was just burying himself in work and alcohol and not willing to look at himself, but that turns out to be wrong. Perhaps he has looked at his role in the marriage and seen where he has taken me for granted and not taken any interest in my life. My IC asked if I'd mentioned his different behaviour to him and I said no not yet, I feel like it needs the right moment and things are only just warming up between us. I won't have any R talks and so on if I can help it, just try to continue being patient, accepting and keeping my expectations low but in a positive direction.
My neighbour contacted me saying we should meet for a coffee sometime, she said things are bad for her and if I knew anything about rights that would be useful. She's not married to her bloke (and she's never worked) though they've been together 20 years and have 2 teens together so financially she will be devastated I imagine. I feel bad for her but I don't think I can be her shoulder to cry on right now. I do feel terrible for her, but I feel like I have to protect myself from too much real life traumatic stuff I think. Whatever peace I've found recently feels fragile, I'm not sure I can go through all that initial trauma stuff again right now.
