Anthony, overall it sounds like you're doing fine, I would just caution you to be careful not to be cold and indifferent towards her. It sounds like you are doing that, which to her is just going to look like "more of the same" behavior. Detach, but LOVINGLY detach. Read Sandi's rules every day and let those govern your behavior.
Originally Posted by AnthonyA
I so wanted to tell her to have the OM co-sign for her. I also wanted to say, welcome to the real life of a single person and the stuff you think is easy to deal with. I hope I handled the situation ok.
You definitely don't want to cosign for someone who wants a D. Who knows what the future holds, she may move in with OM in 6 months and bail on her lease leaving YOU responsible for it. As for the above yes it's good that you didn't say that. Don't be mean/ sarcastic, again that will just look like "more of the same". Show her what she'll be missing.
Well done on the running, that's a great pace! I used to be a runner logging around 50 a week, now I hate running to the mailbox
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She is still using my credit card to do things such as buy groceries (for her consumption and children's consumption). She has used it to take my son out to eat when I went to the father-daughter dance this past weekend.
Should I start the moving on from the M and ask her to give me the credit cards that are in my name (she is an authorized) user and say that I will be buying the groceries that are needed for the children and me for the rest of the month. She can use her money and her credit card to purchase her separate items. Or should I just wait until April to have that discussion.
It sounds like she is being reasonable and just using it for joint living expenses but you might tell her now that when she moves out you will be taking her name off your cards and expecting her to use her own card from then on.
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I don't want to appear as "punishing" her but she has decided to move out
This is one of those things you need to do no matter how it makes her feel. This isn't about making the wrong impression on her, it's about protecting yourself financially. Once she is out of the house she may very well turn her life into a scene out of "girls gone wild", you don't want to be on the hook for that. Just be firm and consistent about this.
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She is making preparation to move out. I am just trying to figure out when I should do this.
I would do the transition when she moves, that would be a good cutoff point that makes sense.
