Did you look up narcissist? I didn't want to throw terms like that around as we tend to get stuck on labels, but like AS, it was my first thought on reading your sitch and again on reading the above. The inability to apologies, the pursuit of the EA, the bullying and the childishness.
I respect your decision to stand by him and I think you should read up on the above. It takes more than unconditional love to fix a narcissist.
