I've been thinking too much about her the last couple of days.

I know, I need to stop.

Sorry. Just needed to get it off my chest. I've been doing so well up until this past week. Probably because it's the anniversary week of the OM discovery right after the split. A couple of them. It was all pretty fast.

I'm trying to keep my mind occupied with other things, I really, really am.

But tonight, for the first time in a very long time, I cried.

I want so bad to hate her. To feel nothing.

I don't know how possible that is.

I feel like a failure.