Free yourself some more B. Let her go, truly go, from the heart. Move forward.
I am.
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People who are done don't do all of what you just did.
I don't really care if I ever get married again or not. Right now, I'm saying that's not in my future. I know that delaying the D could be a good thing if W ever decided she wanted to work on things...but she literally said that she DID a day before mediation, when she said she DIDN'T.
I've spent a lot of time today going through back texts, screenshots, etc. documenting instances of her being mentally and emotionally abusive towards me (and there's a LOT).
The difference now is that I understand that 1) she's VERY abusive and manipulative, 2) she has intentionally kept me on the back burner for when she wanted attention from me or someone to scapegoat for her problems, 3) I suffered some pretty severe mental and emotional trauma because of her, 4) she really, truly doesn't care for S or I...only herself, and has used S to get attention for herself (and I've documented that as well).
She's not exactly safe to be around at this point. She's starting to have people at work get involved in getting me to do things she wants me to do (like the president of the company), and I'm not letting her push me around.
I'm not even going out of my way to contact her.
I know D is a step in the process. But beyond that, she's got more work than I believe she's capable of to prove that I should trust her, because for the past year, literally EVERYTHING she has said was a lie or an attempt to hurt or manipulate me.
I've let go of the R rope. I'm not done with the "healing from abuse" one yet though.
