World is upside down right now

[othstr]

So, I went back to work yesterday after 3 month maternity leave. It was actually pretty nice, minus the waking up early part, to start to get back to some normalcy that I am familiar with. Everyone was very excited to see me and asked how S is doing. I just jumped right back into teacher mode and had a good day. I joined boot camp class again after being off for 3 months, it felt great to work out with no pregnancy restrictions! The trainer is awesome and knows my sitch and wants me to bring S so that I can continue to come. He hangs out in the car seat or on a mat and then she'll go over and hold him for the rest of the class. I can't ask for more than that. Everyone adores him there

A sort of revelation I had yesterday. One of my colleagues told me I was glowing, and not in a new mom way, something about me was different, a good different. I realized I was smiling the majority of the day, and that felt really good. But, after thinking about it, and talking with a friend, I am just so proud of myself and it really shows. I have gone through the ringer, more than once it seems, and I'm still alive, and I'd say thriving. 99% of my life right now is great, and it feels good.

I then think about H's life and wonder how much of his life is great, I can pretty much guarantee it's not even close to 99%, and that makes me smile.

I did have a few questions I had posted earlier if anyone has any insight on them.