It was more the fear that my XW will find somebody better than me. It's hard, but I think this has taught me humility. If my XW finds happiness with somebody else, it will be a shot to my ego. However, it will prove her right that there was somebody else better for her. Is that such a bad thing? Not for anything except my pride.
There will always be someone better looking than you, someone smarter than you, someone who earns more or has a better job than you. If she meets someone else and you are looking for the answers to the 'why did she leave me' question then you will find it (whether that be looks, money, career). I know if my H dated someone who was blonde, my instinctual response would be I am not "blonde" enough. If he started dating someone who was younger than me, my response would be "I am too old". I will always focus on something they have that I do not. Whilst knowing this will not change the instinctual response (I am not [insert whatever it is they have that I don't] enough) but it will mean that once the gut response passes, I will be able to ask the more important questions ... Is this person a good person?, are they someone I would want to have around my children?.
