svdad, Just getting caught up on your sitch. Every sitch is different but I just wanted to give you a bit of an idea of what way this could go. I was/still am in the same boat as you regarding a lack of plan and understanding on W's part regarding a separation agreement or plans for how D might look. Myself and I think a lot of others on here possibly including you may be under the impression that our spouse getting a dose of reality about D may wake them up and in some cases it does. This did not happen at all in my case. As the months wore on my thoughts turned into "I want her to make a plan so we can get this settled and I can start to really move on with my life". That didn't happen either. I could be wrong but I have a feeling your W may be perfectly content ignoring anything to do with actually officially separating and the more you try and help her understand the reality of it the more she will avoid the subject.
Hey Ryan, thanks for that! My wife is *very* keen on getting divorced. She wants it done asap. The problem is - I have supported her and done nearly everything for her for the last 16 years. She is content being in fairly tale land with OM up to this point. She needs to come to the table with the reality of D and what it entails, and let me know her plan on financials, child agreements, etc and so far has none of that. Is that like your sitch or no?
svdad, if you go back and read my threads you'll see my W also was going the "hey, online D is the path of least resistance, and I want to get it done fast and painlessly". What woke her up is I went and talk to a L. At that point she realize "ok, he isn't on board with my quickie, let's get it done now, D". My W is a college-degreed, smart woman. But her WW fog had her wanting to just be done with the marriage without having to do any real work to D. I guarantee she isn't interested in the reality of D because of that fairy tale fog. Again, the only thing I think you did wrong was to have the discussion with her at all. But do what Twofeet says and get a consult with a L. Know your side whether she knows her side or not.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
