It's all part of the trouble with standing -- it HURTS. Thinking of how I felt when I first knew about the A, year two or three of this mess, and how I feel now upon rediscovery, at least I can see that I am not the same totally unequipped Gerda. Before I would collapse for days and smoke a pack of cigarettes. Now I just post to Gordie and go to work. : )
Standing is by far the most difficult thing I have ever, ever done. And yes, Gerda, it does hurt. Badly. A friend gave me a small devotional at Christmas about "pruning the vine", that in order for us to flourish, God prunes us, sometimes way, way back. But, it's necessary for us to flourish. I think that because we can handle the setback and hurt by getting on with our life, working, friends, family, etc., means that our growth is starting up again, and we are on our way to flourish.
The pruning hurts, a lot. I can hardly wait for the time to arrive where I'm flourishing. In God's own time. It will be worth it all in the end, I'm sure.
I will be thinking about you during this Lenten season, and will be faithful in my prayers. Blessings to you.
