W asked me if I had plans for night of Sat. March 16th
She wants to go out to a St. Patrick's Day event with coworkers at Queen Mary in Long Beach. I told her I'd check.
Implied is I would feed myself and put boys to bed.
Bo, as long as the two of you are under the same roof there needs to be some communication and coordination on things like this. Your W is giving you plenty of notice, I can't think of a single valid reason for you to not accommodate her on this. Likewise if you make plans to do something with friends then give her plenty of notice as well. That's only fair.
I'm curious why you emphasized that you would need to feed yourself and put the boys to bed, it sounds like you're implying that's your W's job. I'm sure you're perfectly capable of this?
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Thing is, last Sunday, when I chaperoned Winter Formal, she needed her Mom over to help her with all that.
I doubt she "needed" her mom there to feed herself and put the boys to bed. She probably just invited her over so she could spend some time with her.
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Tell her "I have plans,"
Honest question here- why would you do that? What is your goal, and would this action get you closer to your goal or farther away?
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or be the bigger man / parent and take care of myself and boys whereas she needed help?
How is feeding yourself and putting the boys to bed one night being "the bigger man"? Honestly your whole post is confusing me, where are you getting this idea that punishing your W by refusing to parent your kids for one night is helping your sitch?
